It had taken under three hours for my ISP to begin receiving reports that I was sending spam. I received several colorful e-mails about my worth as a human being, and one from my ISP, “Spamming is unacceptable and your account will be terminated if you continue.”

I had unwittingly followed the advice of a professional spammer – the guy who sold me the program! I felt misguided and slimy. It was the only time I ever used the three-hundred dollar software. Expensive lesson.

This is how many “newbies” learn that what they are doing is against “netiquette” or the etiquette of the Internet, and sometimes against the law, depending on the contents and where the message is being sent.

If I were to make this mistake today, the consequences would be much more serious. I was rightfully labeled a spammer because I had sent e-mail to a list of people whose addresses had been harvested involuntarily from numerous Web sites and newsgroups on the Internet.

I quickly learned that the only acceptable lists to mail to are called “opt-in,” which I’ll cover shortly, and include only people who want to receive certain types of e-mail. I would never repeat this offense, but just last year, I found myself in the hot seat again!

I had received a motivational e-mail that I loved and decided to share it with a group of online associates. I copied and pasted it into a new e-mail and hit send. Surprisingly, I received a response saying I should be careful not to spam the group, or I risked being barred from posting!

Not feeling I had spammed, it took several anxious e-mails before I realized my error. It turned out my posting was a chain letter, encouraging recipients to forward it to their friends. Propagating this type of e-mail often leads to massive forwarding. This creates huge files and can bog down and even crash servers.

The message I sent was all text, but I remember receiving one from a well-meaning cousin that was loaded with graphics and took several minutes to download. Once it finished, I had no interest in the message, and was irritated at the waste of my time. She, along with most people who forward these type of messages, had no idea she was spamming.

Lesson learned? Non-commercial e-mail isn’t exempt from the label of spam.

Sometimes even knowing the full definition of spam isn’t enough to protect you. Unfortunately, even the unsubstantiated accusation that you spammed can be enough to get you barred from discussion lists and newsgroups, and admonished or cancelled by your ISP.

The accusers know this, and many enjoy damaging others reputations. I know first hand because, yep! You guessed it, it happened to me! In the course of researching this article, I was falsely accused of spamming two discussion lists, owned by the same person. Without any hesitation on the part of the list hosting company, I was instantly barred from posting to ALL lists offered from their Web site!

My accuser accomplished this feat with no proof, and it was just assumed that I was spamming. Even my ISP was notified, resulting in my being admonished by them. Embarrassing.

Fortunately, I didn’t lose my ISP account, but this person has impacted my life by the mere accusation. I am no longer allowed to participate in any lists hosted by this company. There is no end to my ostracism in sight, either, because the list company won’t answer my e-mails.

I was a convicted (without trial) spammer, akin to a lower life form, and therefore, insignificant. Ouch! This goes to show that the number of postings that are genuine spam are so numerous, that the company has adopted a one strike and you’re out policy. Whether or not you have actually spammed is currently irrelevant. A work around for this is to use a different e-mail address, but I would have liked to have been able to defend myself.

Now that you have a better understanding of why and how not to spam. What can you do when you’re on the receiving end of unwanted e-mail? Stopping all spam is impossible for those of us who interact online. There are actually ISP’s that cater to spammers, allowing them to e-mail anything to anyone in any number - for a price. And if your e-mail address is out there, almost anywhere, they have the software to find it! Spammers run the gamut from the greedy and malicious, to pranksters, misinformed newbies, and misbehaving children. Then there are the well organized groups that share information and tactics on the best anonymous e-mailing techniques.

Dealing with the spam you receive depends on whether or not you can identify the spammer. Oh, and don’t bother sending remove requests, as this just verifies for the spammer that your e-mail address is valid.

In the real world, spam happens. If you deal with it rationally, you’ll keep your self-respect and usually get the result you want - less spam!

Fortunately, there are organizations run by people passionate about making spammers accountable for their actions. They can also show you how to drastically reduce the level of spam that reaches your inbox. I was awed by the number of Web sites devoted to understanding and controlling spam!

Organizations like www.Cauce.org (learn about S .1618 here) were created by Netizens to advocate for a legislative solution to stopping spam. www.SpamRecycle.com (a little gaudy, but informative) gives you a free outlet to forward your spam to the appropriate federal authorities. Run a search for spam on any search engine and you’ll receive dozens of links to sites designed to teach you how to cyber-slay the spammers. The course of action you chose will depend on how much time you want to devote to “spam control.”

Now let’s say you’re looking for something specific and actually want to be contacted by online merchants. How can you go about getting the information you desire without being subjected to megabytes of spam? Simple! You can do what is called “opting-in.”

There are savvy companies out there, like PostMasterDirect.com who have meticulously compiled lists of e-mail address of people who want specific types of commercial e-mail. You visit their Web site and fill in a form specifying your areas of interest. You will then periodically receive e-mail from different online vendors who have purchased the right to use the list your e-mail address is on, for a one-time mailing.

There is another company called Respond.com that allows you to anonymously submit a request for various items and services. After being screened by Respond.com, your request goes out to their registered sellers, who in turn contact you with their offer.

You may receive several responses, depending on your request. Just be sure to ask about warranties and guarantees, so you don’t get stuck with something you can’t get serviced or return, if it’s not quite right. You may stop the responses at any time, and your personal information is never circulated.

If you’re looking for specialized information, try AskMe.com. You can use AskMe.com to find experts on every topic you can think of! You go there and choose an expert, ask your question, anonymously if you prefer, and receive an e-mail response when your answer is ready.

The Internet is a work in progress and the issue of spam is a challenging one. There will always be those who deliberately misinform in an attempt to defraud and profit from the inexperience of others. In fast-growing online communities, this is unfortunately inevitable. Only by sharing information, the original purpose of the Internet, can we protect people from the spammers, the scammers, and occasionally, from themselves.

Now you have enough information to eliminate as much spam from your life as is humanly possible, and to use the Internet with the confidence you’ll never unintentionally spam anyone. You also have an article to send to your cousin the next time she clogs your inbox with spam!

Tracy Austin ©2001
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